|Accountable Care||Care provided by those who only know how to subtract|
|Health care consumer||Patients - If your patients are alive, they cost the system money|
|KOLs (Key Opinion Leaders)||"Yes" Men and Women for Industry - I was first going to call these individuals "industry whores" but not all of them accept fees from industry for their opinions. The opinions of KOLs, however, uniformly jive with the industry interests they speak about.|
|Lean Six Sigma||Reducing staff-to-patient ratios as low as possible - and substituting kiosks for them instead.|
|Quality Measure||An order you seem to have forgotten that makes people money.|
|Meaningful Use||A measure of one's ability to use a keyboard - To suggest another definition is silly since no one will be paid to deliver care in the future unless they have purchased a very expensive computer system tells you what to type and when to type it.|
|Wellness Initiative||Health Data Collection Opportunity - Remember, "wellness" is not the opposite of illness.|
Hope this helps!