Sunday, November 23, 2008

Evening Rounds

2:32 AM: * bleeeeep bleeep bleeeep *

Fumbling, doctor finds pager and pushes display button.

"Please call Charlene x1234 re: rm 3125."

Doctor thinks: Hmmm, Charlene. Room 3125. But which hospital? Begins to make calls.

* Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Click.
"If you'd think this is an emergency, please dial 911..."


Wrong number.

* Briiiiing brinnnng briiiiing.... Click. *

"Hello?"

"Hi, this is Doctor Fisher, returning your page?"

"Who?"

"Doctor Fisher, calling about a patient in room 3125?"

"I'm sorry, you must have the wrong number..." * Click *

Trying again...

* Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Brriiiiing. Click. *

"Hello, this is Doctor Fisher calling for Charlene regarding the patient in Room 3125."

"Doctor who?"

"Doctor Fisher."

"Are you taking care of Mr. Jones in 3125?"

"I'm covering for Electrophysiology, I have no idea who resides in room 3125, but I'm returning a call for the Cardiac Electrophysiology service for Charlene."

"You're not orthopedics?"

"No."

"What was your name again?"

"Dr. Fisher."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I was looking for Dr. Fish."

* Click *

* Sigh *

-Wes

2 comments:

Dr. Val said...

Wow, you've just captured the essence of every third page I received as an intern in internal medicine. Bravo. :)

Anonymous said...

Just imagine...

[phone keeps ringing until picked up]

Wuzzeia, Hellosss?

Hey, is Charlene there?

This is, iss, is her.

Great! I was wondering how Mr. Jones did last night. Since I was at work I thought I would just check in to see how he did.

Wuuuaaaaa?

What did he eat last night? I tell him to eat more fiber but he just insists on colace. How often did he use his PCA?

Buueaaa, I am, I am, I am home sleeping!

I know but since I was awake I just thought I would check in to see how things went.

[Ohhhh, if only we could....]